we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
