Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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