I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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