You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
