Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
this will be a night to untag.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
