Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
