Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize