So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
