Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
