absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
