I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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