Can Purell be used as lube?
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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