i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
