May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
