Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
