real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Randomize
