I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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