There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
My nipple is on Facebook.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize