smell my finger.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
