Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Drunk is not a location!
Randomize
