So drunk, too bad you don't want this
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
