apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I wish you could order shots online.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize