dude i'm inner monologue high
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
