she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
