chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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