I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
