Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
