Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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