i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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