I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
