I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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