I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
