i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
