Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
