Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
