I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
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