Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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