So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
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