It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
do herpes really smell.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
