At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
