yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
