My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
