franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
