The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
