I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
i need some magic done to my vagina
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
