At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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