If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
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