Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
