You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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