i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
